Lessons from an online troll
In the bizarro world of social media, there are many measures of success. You have followers. Then you have the number or people who like an individual post. Then you have engagement, which is how interactive your profile is with others (followers and other profiles). But the biggest measure of success is when you get an online troll. A true troll is not just suggestive comments left in your DMs, but someone who actually dislikes something that you say or do enough to publicly denounce it (or you).
Well, I am officially a success!
My online troll puzzled me. First of all, she seems to be a real person, living in my community. And she actually seems (at least superficially) to be someone with whom I would connect in real life. Her posts are not personal, but positive and uplifting to artists and other small businesses. Why she would choose to tear me down feels a bit mysterious.
She left the following comment: “I’m confused, what’s fitness or wellness oriented about wine? Alcohol is inherently unhealthy. To be clear, I do drink, just don’t delude myself that it’s health-enhancing.”
Let’s give her the benefit of the doubt: she was commenting on an ad for my special event “Sip, Savor and Stuzzichino,” so perhaps she did not notice the rest of my content about health, fitness, habit change, travel, etc. So in isolation, maybe she was indeed confused by a fitness company talking about food and wine.
But, let’s talk about deluding yourself. Believing alcohol is inherently unhealthy, and yet choosing deliberately to do something viewed as harmful is truly a self-destructive pattern. This view perpetuates shame and disordered thinking about food, alcohol, body image and self-esteem. All-or-nothing thinking breaks things down into black-and-white categories of “good” and “bad”. This can lead to binging, remorse, self-loathing, and a hoard of other negative beliefs, none of which will help develop or maintain healthy, sustainable habits.
When I choose to indulge, whether it’s with wine or gelato (or perhaps with a bubblebath or massage), these are things that I do in combination with a lifestyle that prioritizes healthy eating, exercise, stimulating experiences, good friends, community, and the people that I love. I am not deluding myself into thinking any one thing is bad or good for me because all of those things can be bad when they’re in excess. I’m simply balancing my life in a way that makes my choices sustainable in the long run.
My response to my troll?
“Life in balance is sweet. Alcohol is not inherently bad or good in isolation. It’s all in how it is combined with other lifestyle choices. On FitCation, alcohol is served with tired muscles after active explorations of beautiful places, and paired with a lovingly prepared meal with fresh local ingredients. This IS a part of a healthy balanced lifestyle.”
Exert. Explore. AND Indulge.